The Introduction (with assistance from Q)
by Jay'a and Shiane
Summary: We weren't sure how to introduce ourselves so we decided to get a little bit of help from our buddy Q!
1. Default Chapter

The Introduction (with assistance from Q)

Jay'a: [Dragging a slightly taller girl through a hallway] C'mon Shi, stop squirming! I told Q we'd let him give his opinion on our intro's and stuff. [Kicks open an Office door] Hi Q!

Q: I was wondering when you two were gonna show up. You were the ones who wanted my opinion on something.

Jay'a: [as Shi glares at her] *sweat drop* Ah, heh heh, right.

Shiane: [stops glaring, looks sheepish] Ah, yeah, well... Ya know how I'm living in Toyama now.

Q: Yes, that is kind of covered in the omnipotent part.

Shiane: Why you.. you.. nerf herder you! That's it! How dare you insult my intelligence as if I was.. was.. Wesley Crusher!!!!!!! [let's loose a cry of fury and proceeds to attack Q]

Jay'a: [smacks herself in the head] How do I get myself into these things? [grabs Shi] NO! Shi! Calm down... Take a deep breath... That's it... Kay. Now. [looks at Q] You. No more smart-ass comments. Got it? 

Q: Fine. [leans back] 

Shiane: [breathing heavily, gets control of herself] Anyways... Jay'a and I decided to share our experiances with the Ronins with other people. So we're going to start writing down some of our adventures for other people to read. 

Q: Because misery loves company, right.

Shiane: [waves hand tiredly in the air] Something like that. 

Jay'a: Yeah, so anyhoo, 'cause we're both such nice people [looks around suspiciously], we decided to introduce ourselves to the world first. That's where you come in. You're the sound board.

Q: You know, I kinda feel bad for the world... 

Jay'a: I said no more smart-ass comments. Shiane: Seriously though, we really need help with coming up with the best way to introduce ourselves. Like how do we go about doing it? And what exactly do we tell everyone? 

Q: Okay, seriously now. Hmm... Well, what do you look like? Jay'a what do you look like? Jay'a: Uh, short. NO, wait! PETITE! Yeah petite, with short brown hair, and blue eyes. Um, my feet are a size six [she grins], my dresses are a size four. Uhh, I'm pretty, at least Luke thinks so. At least he sure as Hell better think so... [Shiane giggles] 

Q: Alright, enough of you. Shi what do you look like? 

Shiane: My looks are more classical than petite and bubbly. My hair is as short as Jay'a's and it's a much lighter brown, especially because I get it glitzed (sort-of highlighting). My eyes are hazel so they can appear different shades of blue, like blue-grey, blue-green, etc. It depends on what I'm wearing. Oh yeah, I wear size five jeans, I'm about 3 inches taller than Jay'a but I wear the same shoe size. She's built like a dancer while I'm built like a runner. 

Q: Okay, so what are your personalities like? Shiane: I'm evil! [starts susupicious hysterical laughter] Q: Let me phrase that differently. What kinds of things do you like? Vanilla vs. chocolate, dogs vs. cats, sci-fi vs. scary, etc. 

Shiane: Original vs. Next Generation! [continues insane laughter, now bouncing up and down] 

Q: [wincing] You gave her Mountain Dew didn't you.

Jay'a: I plead the fifth! Can I be evil too? [Joins in the insane laughter] 

Q: ........... 

Jay'a: Chocolate, cats and sci-fi!! [high-fives Shi, continues to laugh] But I gotta say that I'm a Next Gen person. DS9 too. As far as that goes, I'm the innies and she's the outies. [thinks] But I got an outtie belly button, see? [more peals of laughter from both, this time from the floor]

Q: [sighs] And this one had Pepsi... 

Jay'a: DUDE!! And Star Wars!! [yet more hysterical laughter] 

Q: [another sigh] Well, nothing's gonna get done while you two are hyped up on caffine. [looks at two teens in hysterics] So..... [snaps fingers]

{time fasts fowards} 

Shiane: [groggily] Urgh, can't you omniopotent beings be more gentle when you do that. 

Q: Sorry but You asked for My help. Now then, let's get some basics. Where do you live? 

Shiane: [recovering from time phase] Toyama, Japan. Q: And who do you live with? 

Shiane: My guardian Connor MacLeod and my cat Mica. FYI, Mica and I share a telepathic bond and he can shapeshift into a large black panther when necessary. 

Q: Okay Jay'a, where do you live and who do you live with? 

Jay'a: I live on Yavin with my bf, Luke. He's mine, mine, mine! I don't care what anyone else tells you. He's my sweetie, my Tiger. That's why my Office door says "Beware of Low Flying Tigers". I think Shi made that up. 

Q: O...kay.

Shiane: I made one for myself too. It says "Your worst nightmare has come true." 

Q: Because you're put in charge of our lives, right. I got it. 

Shiane: Yeppers! 

Jay'a: [nods and grins] Pretty scarey, huh? [checks her watch] Dude, we oughta wrap this fun stuff up pretty soon. Me, Luke, and the Kyp-meister are gonna grab Wedge and Cor and them an' go check out the bar scene. [looks at Shi] Wanna go? 

Shiane: Hell yeah! Kyp and I want to hold another droid race. Cor's gotta bring Whistler 'cause I'm taking bets!

Q: All right, I think we've covered all the important basics. You guys can post this now. And, hey, put me down for 50 creds on Whistler. Oh wait, was there anything else that you guys wanted to add? 

Jay'a and Shiane: Umm... well... let's see. I guess... I don't know.. Jay'a: Oh I got one. We should probably mention that we're both Jedi. 

Shiane: And that I'm a Ronin Warrior.

Jay'a: And.... 

Shiane: And what? 

Jay'a: Well, I have my Tiger and you have your Hairball! 

Shiane: Sage is not a hairball! [thinks] Well, I guess he is. But he's a cute hairball. And he's MY hairball!

Jay'a: [grins] That's all I wanted to know. 

Q: ...I need new friends. 

___________________________________________________________________________________________Well, there ya go. That's some of who we are. What do ya think? (Besides the fact we're insane....) 


	2. The Office

Disclaimer: We don't own Star Wars, Star Trek, Ronins, or anything like that. Just ourselves and the Office stuff. Oh, Part three of The Tales of Mia is in production!

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THE OFFICE

This is just a little something to give you an idea of what this "Office" thing is that's in later, longer fics. I wish I could give you a clear-cut definitive, "It is this." Unfortunately, I can't. Hey sometimes even we get confused. 

But before you turn away in frustration and disgust, we can explain to you this: we can explain what it is that Office people do.

To start off, Office people work for a Company. Whether or not the company has a real name, we don't know. We don't own it, we don't run it, we just pick up our paychecks every two weeks. We're pretty sure that the main purpose of the Company is to study people, but unlike the Q (for you Start Trek fans) we try to make a good first impression. Also the Q don't get paid - obscenely. The Company basically sends its field workers out to particular groups to hang out with the people for awhile. Most field personnel are in Department A (like us). Department A is made up of full-time employees (Jay'a) and freelancers (Shiane).

When a Company employee is first hired into Department A, There is usually a training period. Mine (Jay'a) was two years, and it was a rather pointless two years considering I didn't do any real work. (Q trained me. That might be why.) I did do intro work to prepare for my Star Wars group, but that was it. Anyway, after the training period (the length varies), the employee is assigned to his/her first group. When said employee gets there... well technically said employee isn't supposed to do anything. The general rule is that employees are not allowed to do major re-workings of major story lines. For example, if you're working Star Wars, you can't suddenly decide that you want to date Han or Leia. The two are an established couple. Even I had to follow this rule when Luke started dating Callista. I was very unhappy. I was even more unhappy when I found out that Luke marries Mara. But, as you'll be able to tell from my longer fics, I "fixed" that because my fics take place much, Much, MUCH later. My point is that I follow the rules too. Back to new employees. They're supposed to interact with the people, observe what goes on, and then write a report. But no one ever does that last part. Almost no one reads them anyway.

As employees gain experience, they aren't given assignments anymore. They can choose their own groups and come and go as they please. The reason for this is that the more you hang out with a group and the more of a relationship you build, the less time you have to start a new group. A typical newbie in the first few years could have as many as seven or eight groups: a couple major ones, two or three minor ones, and a few one shot deals. After a few years, this person may only have two major ones and a couple minor ones. A major group basically means that established action (movies, books, episodes, etc.) continue without you having to do anything. This includes Star Wars, Star Trek, and the like. A minor group is one in which after the established action ends, you have to put forth some effort (Ronins, etc.). You can play author as well as character and also the rule of noninterference doesn't apply because you can limit yourself as much or as little as you want. 

As I mentioned before, Office employees get paid obscenely. It's pretty silly since we don't really do anything. To give you an idea, I make about $200,000 a year. It's not as if I do anything with it either. I take out food money and pocket cash and the rest of it sits in a bank account gaining interest. And gaining interest, and gaining interest, and getting another deposit, and gaining interest, etc. The whole thing is just disgusting. Though I suppose I shouldn't complain about that, given how much I do complain about various stupid people that I have to work with in certain groups. But that still doesn't stop my salary from being obscene. 

Many people share groups. It's no big deal and most people end up doing it at some point. Shi and I share a couple of them. We share the Rouge Squadron section of the Star Wars group and the Original Star Trek group (though she's there a heckuva lot more than I am). We used to share the Voyager group too, but I ended up giving my part to Kypster so now they share that. We also mix groups. That just means that we tell people what we do, show 'em around the Office and let them hang out with people from other groups. They often become friends in their own right, being able to hang out even without the Office person being around. 

Another question that's probably been running through your mind (or not) is, "If there's a Department A, is there a Department B?" Yep, there is. Dept. B, otherwise known as the Psyche Department, is made up of the people who are supposed to be reading our reports. My friend Sean, who works over there, says that when an employee stops sending reports, the psyche people just watch him or her work with the computers (more on that later). No one knows what these people do with the information they get besides analyze it. I think it's because they're studying the employees as well as the groups. 

Everything else about the office is pretty much stereotypical office stuff: offices, conference rooms, coffee break rooms, lounges. Except the computers. The computers are one of the coolest things about this job. In addition to being the primary storage for everything, the computers can look in on almost anyone, almost anywhere. (Yes we do keep them out of the restrooms.) For example, if Shiane didn't know where I was and she wanted to check it out before she popped in on me, she could go into anyone's office (since we all keep each other on file), and set the computer for "camera mode". A prompt would ask for location or a person and she would click "person". Then she'd have to click on my name and she'd get a real-time image of whatever I was doing at the moment. It's very useful, and I've taught some of my more responsible group members to use it. 

That's the essence of the whole thing. You gotta be responsible when working with this stuff and these people. Even if it turns everything into one massive pain in the butt, you gotta do it the hard way sometimes. 

So that's the Office. I hope my explanations, such as they were, were good enough so you won't be confused about some stuff in our longer stories. I just hope you're not more confused than when I started. Anyway, we hope you enjoy our stories, even the especially lengthy ones. 

-Office personnel

Jay'a - Office 10 – "Beware of Low Flying tigers"

Shiane - Office 9 - "You're Worst Nightmare Has Come True"

Shiane here! Most of what Jay'a wrote is true for everyone who works in the Office. However, there are some things about the Office itself that she left out, and some rules as well. But these are more complicated than would be wise to include in a basic explanation of the Office. Also, some things that are true for regular employees like Jay'a, aren't true for freelancers like myself and vice versa. But like I said, that's too much to go into in the basic explanation. They'll have to follow up later. Well, that's all for me! May the Force be with ya! 


End file.
